Secrets unfold, joining torn pages of their lives...
Fixing the invisible creases on my turquoise pinafore for the umpteenth time, I breathed nervously as the bell rang, its sound resonating within my heart. Lightly caressing my tightly braided hair, I swiveled to one side and asked again, “Do I look okay?”
She rolled her eyes and huffed in annoyance, “For the hundredth time, yes.”
I mustered a few words in guilt as my shoulders slumped.
Her face softened as she rested her hand on my shoulder, “Naina, you look fine. Honestly.”
“I’m just nervous.” I finally admitted, each word slipping like a dubious ripple from a sea of emotions.
Before my best friend could say anything more, I turned towards another girl, almost my age, gazing dreamily. I tapped her shoulder vigorously, trying to grab her attention while she busied herself adoring someone else.
“Preeti, stop staring at him for once!” I stifled a scream to which my cousin straightened. She whispered with a terse arch of the eyebrows, “Is it that obvious?”
Both Swati and I tilted our heads in sarcasm before nodding in affirmation, “As clear as crystal.”
“Do you think I should talk to him?” She spoke with a newfound excitement in her voice.
“To Pandit? Of course not, Preeti. Don’t you know the rule? The girl never makes the first move!” Swati burst out as the glee in Preeti’s eyes dimmed.
“Ugh! Why can’t I confess first though?” She whined as the other students continued to usher to each other in whispers.
“Because you’re a girl.” I explained, shying away the moment I said so.
“You think that’ll make him fall for you?” Preeti reasoned blatantly as my face fell.
“That won’t?” I asked in worry.
“Of course not. Naina, he’s Sameer Maheshwari. He won’t buy all those girlish antics.” Preeti continued with a wave of a hand.
“He’s Sameer Maheshwari, Preeti. A hero. He wants a heroine. And it’s a must for heroines to blush, to show their soft, feminine side.” Swati argued on the basis of her Bollywood flimsy knowledge.
“Why should Naina pretend? Be yourself, Naina.” My sister turned towards me.
“Naina is a shy girl.” My best friend too put a hand on my arm, as if claiming authority.
“Not all the time.” Preeti defended, scrutinizing her eyes.
Swati mimicked her pugnacious tone, “Naina, do you want to lure him or not?”
“Do you want him to love the real you, or the one you pretend to be.” Preeti rebutted with equal fervor.
“Okay, stop.” I finally blurted, unable to contain myself any longer. My eyes shut as I found myself being sandwiched between the two pillars of strength in my life.
“By the way, how are you sure he’ll come to you?” Preeti ignored my outbreak and wondered in curiosity.
“He did smile at me yesterday.” I justified, reminiscing the magical moment once again. As my lips started to curve into a smile, my heart rejoiced at his flowy hair that brushed with the wind, his stylish gait that made heads turn, his charismatic face that reflected innocence, his cocky attitude that seeked love.
Swati clicked her fingers, breaking my reverie, “That was one awkward exchange of smiles, Naina. He probably forgot.”
“He definitely remembers.” I assured, convincing myself more than my friends.
“There he is.” Three excited pair of orbs drifted towards the classroom door. Only one heart missed a beat.
I fidgeted with the hem of my floral pink shirt as I reached the threshold of the classroom. My denim blue skirt danced frivolously with the gusting wind, igniting a sensation of tremor within me. My plight felt the same despite the contrast in circumstances. I wasn’t the Naina Agarwal who took efforts to grab his attention, yet I was reminiscing our first interaction, inwardly wishing for it again. I wasn’t the naive girl who fell for his cockiness and yet my innocence resurfaced, jolting a thousand indescribable feelings I thought had diminished.
And within seconds, I found my steps crossing the threshold inside the classroom, where two orbs pierced through mine, making my breath hitch.
Everyone had taken their seats, filling each bench with muffled giggles and trending gossip. A few swift turns of pages caught my attention as girls stealthily revealed popular tabloids. Boys were busy flaunting new walkmans. I quickened my pace before the professor could interject and walked towards my spot, maneuvering my gaze away from him.
I lifted my lids in astonishment finding my seat occupied by a girl I rarely knew. Before I could request her to move, my mind made a terse decision and I moved to the adjacent bench. Receiving a shocked expression at my unexpected gesture, he raised his eyebrows while I lifted mine, asking him to shift a little.
“Sameer Maheshwari…” I called out in whispers, grabbing his attention which had deviated to the melancholic professor once again.
Once he finally tore his gaze from the blackboard and gave a clueless look I decided to play along, “Naina Agarwal, remember?”
“So?” His smirk widened as a smile crawled on my face too.
I stood up the second he walked in, clearing my throat as anxiety creeped through my veins. As I waited in anticipation he surfed around the desks with a swirl of wind, his hair flying fearlessly, adding on to the nervousness.
I was hoping he’d notice me. But he didn’t.
I was wishing he’d remember me. But perhaps he had forgotten.
“Look, he didn’t remember!” Preeti exclaimed in hushed whispers as he took his place. Dejectedly, I slumped on my bench, murmuring to myself, “He forgot.”
“Of course he did. He saw you for a second, Naina. How do you expect a hero like him to remember you when he gets all the female attention.” Swati reasoned with a brush of hand in the air.
“It wasn’t just a second, Swati. It was much more.” I castigated automatically. They didn’t know what I knew. What he should’ve known.
“To you it was, Naina.” My best friend huffed before giggling a little at my innocence.
“I told you before. Go, talk to him, Naina.” Preeti urged, defending her earlier stance.
Before Swati could intervene, my sister continued, “Forget the so-called rules, Naina. Who cares whether it’s the girl or the boy who makes the first move. You taking the lead wouldn’t make you any less of a girl.” She argued incessantly, putting forth an ideology I had considered indecent. But not anymore, not when the boy who was so special to me gave me my first heartbreak.
Walking up to him with a newfound tenacity in my gait, I spoke loud enough for him to hear, “Sameer Maheshwari?”
He turned around in his seat, his elbow resting on the wooden desk while his brows raised in confusion, “Yes?”
“Naina Agarwal, remember?” I re-introduced myself, eyes glinting with hope that he’d recollect.
“So?” He maintained his monotony through his constant expressions while I heaved a breath in exasperation.
Before I could say anything else, he came up with something totally unexpected, “Name the three people who complained about you annoying me.”
His eyes remained fixated on the blackboard, while I observed a small curve of lips. I could feel the sudden jolt of butterflies in my stomach because I could sense the realization. The acknowledgement that he knew more too. That he remembered more. That he--
“Naina Agarwal?” He snapped his fingers, breaking my chain of thoughts. Composing myself, I cleared my throat and tried to figure out the answer to his question.
Squeezing my eyes shut, I tried to recall moments that flashed like bits of a black and white movie. A movie that had slightly faded. Yet a movie I didn’t take long to find and cherish.
“Pankaj, Veer and..um..” I struggled to remember the third person, unable to identify. It was like a cloud on my memories, that refused to swift, defied to reveal.
“I...um…”
“Naina Agarwal?” A voice resonated in my ears, bringing me back to reality.
“Huh?” I spoke absentmindedly, still in a daze. His smirk widened at my reaction while I looked away in embarrassment.
“Who were the three people who--”
“I don’t remember.” I interrupted succinctly as an attempt to end the conversation.
“I don’t believe it. I’m sure you remember two people.”
“Not that I’m aware of.” I answered blatantly.
“Aw c’mon, I’m sure you do.” Sameer still tugged.
“Lectures have already begun, may you please scoot over so that I can sit?” My request sounded more like a command to which he delightfully obeyed.
My lips broke into a timid grin as he shifted, giving me space to settle with my satchel. However, I didn’t miss the mischievous glint in his eyes, creating an unsettling uproar within me.
“Class, today we’ll move forward with our chapter on secrecy and security.” Professor chanted out loud, silencing every possible sound to a rattle of ink pens.
I opened my notebook to a fresh page, ready to take notes for the day. My gaze shifted to the side to see a Sameer Maheshwari staring at the blackboard with boredom as he constantly tapped his pen against the wooden desk.
With a disappointed look I reminded, “Sameer, this is a classroom, not a movie hall. Focus and learn.”
“You’re doing that for me already.” He met my gaze as I broke it instantaneously.
It suddenly struck, as sharp as a lightning, “How do you know that there were three people?”
“Sorry?” He feigned perplexion while I scrutinized my eyes in beratement.
“Shantinath Nursery School. Same batch. Sameer Maheshwari, the show-stealer.”
“So you do remember…” His lingering smile returned.
“I’ve never forgotten.” I admitted, helplessly grinning myself.
“How do you know, Sameer?” I diverted to the topic of attention.
“How many do you remember?” He repeated his question and I decided to give in.
“Pankaj and Veer.” I confessed without a blink.
“I guess the third one is pretty obvious.” He grinned sheepishly, his hand rubbing his nape.
Within seconds, my eyes widened at the possibility, “It was you!”
“Well, I guess...yes.” He revealed, much to my bewilderment.
“Feel free to chat, but outside my classroom!” Professor’s voice bellowed as a piece of chalk came flying near our faces, just missing its aim.
I gulped in guilt and dove into my notes again, hoping to regain my concentration.
A few minutes passed in eerie silence, and I had started to wonder what had happened to the Sameer Maheshwari who had habituated himself as a nuisance to others.
The next second I regretted my thought, for I heard a whisper, “Naina?”
I closed my eyes to maintain my calm before ignoring him. My impervious reaction must’ve provoked him, for he started tapping on my shoulder.
“What?!” I spat in a muffled voice, gritting my teeth.
“I’m sorry.” He apologized.
“Oh, save it, Sameer. The list is too long.” My voice dripped with hysteria as I eyed him with fury.
“It was a prank.” He elaborated, referring back to our incident at nursery school.
“It cost me a lot of demeanor and humiliation.” I fired.
“That’s why I’m apologizing.”
“Doesn’t matter anymore, Sameer.” I brushed off with a shrug, trying to divert my attention back to my notebook that swarmed with lines filled with notes.
“It does if it still angers you.” He bent forward so that his elbow rested on the desk and his head leaned on his palm.
“Stop with your talks and let me focus, Sameer.” I bluntly said, not interested in engaging in any sort of conversation anymore.
“And to think, I thought this was a new start after all we’ve been through yesterday. I can’t believe I made such a big mistake.”
Sameer suddenly took my hands in his, shedding all inhibitions around us.
With a melancholic shine in his eyes, he confessed,
“I’m full of mistakes and I wish things could be undone. But if I were a mistake, I hope I was your favorite one.”
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